Sridhar Carttons

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శ్రీధర్ కార్టూన్లు

తెలుగు బ్లాగర్లు

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తెలుగు బ్లాగర్లు

'isms'

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Emerging 'isms' of the new economy INFOSYSism
You have a 1000 poor cows.
You put them on a nice campus, & send them one at a time to the US for milking.
WIPROism
GE has a cow. You take 49% of the milk.
DELLism
Intel has a Goat. Samsung has a Camel.
Buy milk from both & sell it as Cow's milk.
IBMism
You have old stubborn cows.
You sell them as pet dogs to innocent small businessmen.
MICROSOFTism
You have a cow. Force the world to buy milk from you.
Spend a million dollars to feed poorer cows.
INTELism
Microsoft makes horse shoes.
You nail them to your cows & wonder why they don't run fast.
SUNism
You have a bull. It doesn't give milk.
You hate Microsoft.
ORACLEism
You have a cow.
You don't know which side to milk, so you sell tools to help milk cows.
SAPism
You don't have a cow.
You sell milking solutions for cows implemented by milking consultants.
APPLEism
You have a cow. You sell iMilk.
SONYism
You have a cow.
You spend $50 mn to develop the world's thinnest milk.
CITIBANKism
Welcome to Citibank.
If you have a cow, press 1.
If you have a bull, press 2...
stay on line if you'd like our customer care to milk it for you.
HPism
You don't know if what you have is a cow.
You sell complete milking solutions through authorised resellers only.
GEism
You have a donkey.
People think you have a 100-year old cow.
If someone finds out, that's his imagination at work.
RELIANCEism
You don't yet have a cow.
You sell empty cans to people for Rs. 501, because Dhirubhai wanted everyone to have milk.
TATAism
You have a very old cow.
You re-brand it as TATA Indicow.
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It happens only for America
1) Fold a $20 bill in half... 2) Fold again, taking care to fold it exactly as below3) Fold the other end, exactly as before
voilà, the PENTAGON on fire!! 4) Now, simply turn it over...
The Twin Towers ablaze....

What a coincidience! A simple geometric fold creates a catastrophic premonition printed on all $20 bills!!!

COINCIDENCE?

... and now... look at this!

TRIPLE COINCIDENCE ON A SIMPLE $20 BILL

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4 weeks in Switzerland + London + New Zealand + Canada = a 4 minute songin Hindi movie
Any actor + Any actress + many movies = David Dhawan
1 smile + 32 teeth = Govinda
1 person - shirt = Salman Khan
1 person + straight hair + un-straight walk = Sanjay Dutt
1 hand + 10 kg weight = Sunny Deol
1 engagement + 2 weddings + 3 wedding songs + 400 relatives + 1 housebigger than Buckingham Palace = One Sooraj Barjataya film
1 software engineer + No Work = 20 forwarded mails
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Today's Picture
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WOMEN DRIVERS OF THE YEAR AWARD
SIXTH PLACE GOES TO......
FIFTH PLACE GOES TO......
FOURTH PLACE GOES TO.....
BRONZE MEDAL GOES TO.....
SILVER MEDAL GOES TO.....
AND THE GOLD MEDAL CHAMPION IS.....
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Today's Picture If you think only in INDIA HE rocks, please think again.
This was taken in JAPAN.
Vanathi this is 4 u
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Funny

Q: What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall?
A: "Dam!"

SEEYE

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Run your mouse over the image when it appears!!! This is Weird!!!
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Read this

One day a father and his rich family took his son to a trip to the country with the firm purpose to show him how poor people can be.
They spent a day and a night in the farm of a very poor family. "Son, How was the trip?", father asked after the trip. "Very good Dad!"
"Did you see how poor people can be?" the father asked. "Yeah!", the son smiled.
"And what did you learn?" The son answered,
"I saw that we have a dog at home, and they have four......
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of the garden, they have a creek that has no end.....
We have imported lamps in the garden, they have the stars....
Our patio reaches to the front yard, they have a whole horizon."
When the little boy was finishing, his father was speechless.
His son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are!"
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Today's Picture
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Name this vehicle With fuel prices going up and up, just developed a new form of transporation.
Name this new transportation vehicle and get one free. Hurry, you have limited period of time.
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Today's Cartoons
Dog Special.

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Once in America a plane crashed, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive.

Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand our languageand reply in actions. The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with themonkey.

Officer: "When the plane took off what were the travelersdoing?"
Monkey: "Tying their belts"
Officer: "What were the airhostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Saying Hello! Good morning!"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Checking the system"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Looking for my people"
Officer: "After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Having beverages and snacks"
Officer: "What were the airhostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Serving the travelers"
Officer: "What were the Pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Eating & throwing"
Officer: "After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Some were sleeping and some were reading"
Officer: "What were the airhostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Make up"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Nothing"
Officer: "Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "All were sleeping"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the air hostess "
Officer: what were you doing?
Monkey: handling the steering !!!!!
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Today's Cartoon
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Today's Picture Laugh a lot it costs nothing
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Watch this video of terrorist attack
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<<< "A letter from HR " >>>


I am pleased to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the14th of October (Saturday). With reference to the meeting held betweenus on the 13th of Oct. at 1400 hrs, would like to present myself as aprospective lover.

Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.

The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses. However I am broadminded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.

I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter,failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice andI shall be considering someone else.

I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, ifyou do not wish to take up this offer.

Wish you all the best!

Thanking you in anticipation,

Yours sincerely,
HR Manager

MECHANIC AND SURGEON

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A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the engine of a car when he spotted a famous heart surgeon in his shop who was standing off to the side waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his car.

The mechanic shouted across the garage," Hello Doctor! Please come over here for a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively "So doctor, look at this. I also open hearts, take valves out, grind them, put in new parts, and when I finish this will work as a new one.

So how come you get the big money, when you and me are doing basically the same work?"

The doctor leaned over and whispered to the mechanic.
"Try to do it when the engine is running."
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Today's Picture
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Read this.. don't miss the last one.

Sign on a railway station at Patna:
Aana free, jaana free, pakde gaye to khana free.
<<<>>>
Seen on a famous beauty parlor in Bombay:
Don't whistle at the girl going out from here.
She may be your grandmother!
<<<>>>
Seen on a bulletin board:
Success is relative.
More the success, more the relatives.
<<<>>>
Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu, Bombay:
We need your heads to run our business.
<<<>>>
this is rocking..
Its God's responsibility to forgive the terrorist organizations such as Jaish, Lashkar etc.
Its our responsibility to arrange the meeting between them and God.
-Indian Armed Forces
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Today's Art

These pictures of secretive art is displayed in Tata Museum, Jamshedpur, Bihar, India.

The picture was presented to the Great Steel Industrial Pioneer of India, Jamshedji Tata, by an artist who kept mystery of picture to be revealed at proper occasion. Unfortunately Jamshedji Tata did not live long to know the secret. It was revealed later. The painting when reflected in a steel pipe stationed at proper spot showed the image of Mr. Tata
Click on the images to view full.

10 Words

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The most selfish one letter word....
"I"
Avoid it.
The most satisfying two letter word ....
"WE"
Use it.
The most poisonous three-letter word....
"EGO"
Kill it.
The most used four-letter word....
"LOVE"
Value it.
The most pleasing five-letter word....
"SMILE"
Keep it.
The fastest spreading six-letter word....
"RUMOUR"
Ignore it.
The hardest working seven-letter word....
"SUCCESS"
Achieve it.
The most enviable eight-letter word....
"JEALOUSY"
Distance it.
The most powerful nine-letter word....
"KNOWLEDGE"
Acquire it.
The most essential ten-letter word....
"CONFIDENCE"
Trust it.
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Names of our IT organizations! What do their names mean!

NIIT: Not Interested in IT

WIPRO: Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output

HCL: Hidden Costs & Losses

TCS: Totally Confusing Solutions

INFOSYS: Inferior Offline Systems

HUGHES: Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping

BAAN: Beggars Association and Nerds

IBM: Implicitly Boring Machines

SATYAM: Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly

PARAM: Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors

C-DOT: Coffee During Office Timings

AT&T: All Troubles & Terrible

CMC: Coffee, Meals and Comfort

BFL: Brainwash First and Let them go

DELL: Deplorable Equipment & lackluster

ORACLE: On-line Romance And Chatting with Lady Employees

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Today's.... Mmmmm, nope it'll continue all days....

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Today's Picture

Dream...
And as you dream,Remember...
That only you can makeYour dreams come true.

There's a wonderful dreamWaiting just for you...
I know you can make it come true.
Have a Great Day Ahead!

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This is Amazing, isn't it.

Nokia888

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The Nokia 888 concept transcends conventional design and allows you to morph into any design you wish, roll it, bend it, clip it, whatever.




Now, you’re not going to see this in stores any time soon. But if you’d like to get an idea of what Nokia thinks the future of communications will look like, take a look at the Nokia 888 communicator, a concept design that recently won Nokia’s Benelux design contest. The bracelet-like 888 is envisioned to use a liquid battery, feature speech recognition, a flexible touch screen, and a touch sensitive body cover. A video showing off the device’s potential features shows off close to a dozen functions, including an alarm clock, PDA, GPS, phone, push email receiver, digital wallet and, of course, jewelry. And, other than the “liquid battery,” we can actually see this in the not-too-distant future.

Reason why students fail in exam

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It's not the fault of the student if he fails, because the year ONLY has 365 days.

Typical academic year for a student:

  1. Sundays-52, Sundays in a year, you know Sundays are for rest. Days left 313.
  2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.Days left 263.
  3. 8 hours daily sleep- 130 days GONE. Days left 141.
  4. 1 hour for daily playing- (good for health) means 15 days. Days left 126.
  5. 2 hours daily for food & other delicacies (chewing properly & swallowing)-means 30days. Days left 96.
  6. 1 hour for talking (man is a social animal)-means 15 days. Days left 81.
  7. Exam days- per year at least 35 days. Days left 46.
  8. Quarterly, Half yearly and festival (holidays)-40 days. Balance 6 days.
  9. For sickness- at least 3 days. Remaining days 3.
  10. Movies and functions - at least 2 days. 1 day left.
  11. That 1 day is your birthday. How can you study on that day??????!!!!!!!!!!

Balance = 0

"Then how can a student pass ??"
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Please comment on this...(only for GALS)
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Today's Download PC or Typewriter
(Size: 192KB)
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Today's Download Dog vs Leopard

Dear Mr. Laloo

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Today's JokeLaloo Prasad sends his bio-data - for a post in Microsoft Corporation, USA.
A few days later he receives the following reply:-

Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad,
You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone calls shall be entertained.
Thanks,
Bill Gates.

Laloo Prasad jumps with joy on receiving this reply. He arranges a press conference:-
"Bhaiyon aur behno, aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki hum ko Amereeca mein naukri mil gayee hai". Everyone is delighted. Laloo Prasad continues...... "Ab hum aap sab ko apnaa appointment letter padkar sunaongaa, par letter angreezi main hai - isliye saath-saath Hindi main translate bhee karoonga."

"Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad, ----- "Pyare Laloo Prasad bhaiyya,
You do not meet ----- Aap to miltay hee naheen ho
our requirement. ----- humko to zaroorat hai.
Please do not send any further correspondence ----- Ab letter-vetter bhejne ka kaouno zaroorat nahee.
No phone calls ----- Phonwa ka bhee zaroorat nahee hai
shall be entertained". ----- bahut khaatir kee jayegi".
Thanks, ----- Aapkaa bahut bahut dhanyavad,
Bill Gates. ---- Bilva.
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Today's Birthday Happy Birthday to Amitabh
I luv him and i luv Sholay.
this picture was taken before the starting of Sholay.

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Today's Pictures

Amazing Chreography and wonderful Photography
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Today's Cartoon

Water Bridge

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Six years, 500 million euros, 918 meters long.......now this is engineering!

This is a channel-bridge over the River Elbe and joins the former East and West Germany, as part of the unification project. It is located in the city of Magdeburg, near Berlin.
The photo was taken on the day of inauguration.

Click on image for closer view